Perfectly Lonely

Indeed.

Cause I don’t belong to anyone and nobody belongs to me.

Thank you John Mayor for perfectly wording this. It is crazy how well this song describes me currently. I have moments where I hate being alone. Someone like me is meant to be spoiling someone rotten at all times. Currently I indulge the children since I have no one to spoil. But today I am in fact perfectly lonely. It’s not a bad thing. It is the way that I want it. Indulge myself in all the spoiling I might do for someone else.

What a beautiful day.

Today I am dreaming of a day that involves the naughty indulgence of diet breaking food, movies and pajamas. Maybe even some ice cream. An entire day devoted to me. It sounds terrible to need some time away from it all. But everything in my life right now is all consuming. Takes every part of me. Leaving nothing behind. So I just want a moment, which in theory a day really is just a moment. The thought of how short this life is and how very few moments just spent in peaceful pajamas just kinda makes me sad.

So today, while I pretend that I get to have a moment to myself, as I sit here babysitting my nephews and wishing I was somewhere else I will be grateful. As I always am. I am alive, I am loved by so many, I have more friends that would help me than I ever thought I would and it all started with a coffee shop to get me there. Brilliant.

All my love peeps,
Lady X