Not sleeping

So here I am, the time approaching midnight and I am not asleep. It’s my own fault, a double tall breve peppermint white mocha aka the calorie bomb, and not decaf are most certainly the reason for it. I yawn, but alas, sleep eludes me. This is what I get. I am not overly worried. Fiona Apple is singing to me as I type this up and I feel quiet inside. I have the urge to write and plenty to write but happily my brain is in an interesting state of quiet. Thoughts not bearing down on me. For this one moment as I sit in my bed, my toddler laying sideways and covered by puppies (and she is totally in my spot) I am content. I’m trying to absorb the moment. They are so few. I need nothing I this moment. This moment is short lived though. My imagination just went into high gear once I said I was content. Dammit.

So what do I do, I think about things that I love. Things that I want, and dream of. Once this week is over its time to bear down and study, time to get back into school. Finish my associates and work towards what I want, which is to teach photography and art.

Should take me next to forever but that’s ok. It’s what happens when you don’t know whon you are for all of your young adult life. Then you hit thirty, you find yourself, and you have a lot of catching up to do.

This week my hope is to finish my Starbucks art, get my pics edited so I can spend all of Saturday shooting party pictures and then after the party pictures are done I can enjoy the scary process of going through what will be at least a thousand images. But it’s all good.

So this wacky no direction post that is probably making very little sense is making me think far too much in many directions this late I thinki should run away and try to sleep. Perhaps I will sleep to dream. To dream of things that will be amazing. Or perhaps not.

I am always here, a click or letter away.

Lady X

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