I decided my last theme was far too dark for good reading. So a change of scenery was due. I am happy to say that I had a fantastic day off yesterday. Went wedding shopping and checked on a marriage license for my brother, it is far too cute that he is getting married. I consider myself lucky to see the day that he is so smitten that he wants to get married. A little part of me is jealous. I wonder if that day will come for me. That a man will want to spend this life with me forever. Every day, constantly. It doesn’t press down on me so I am glad that it is minor jealousy and not envy for my brother that I have. He is a good boy, I am glad to see that a woman has finally stolen his heart.
As for me, I sit here this morning, typing away from the comfort of my bed, listening to the sounds of small children getting ready for school and I know that someone wanting to adopt the situation that I have will be a big step, not just for me and for him, but for my girls, my crazy family and it will be a big deal and on that day I will rejoice that someone realizes how amazingly it is worth it to be with me.
As I get ready to take the kids to school and hope to catch a nap before some early work training and then a very long closing shift I realize that I am lucky. Regardless if single was to remain my status and it would never change to a relationship or even a lifetime commitment I am still more than lucky. I have loved, I have beautiful children and I am excited to spend time in this life regardless. It is magical sometimes. Just thinking about the way God works things just blows my mind. I am grateful for the breath in my lungs, the choices and mistakes I make. Everything can be learned from, the good, the bad, all of it. If you let it teach you. So today, the only thing I want is to see everyone I know and love not waste a moment. Grab every moment and love furiously and intensely and if the moment passes you by I hope that you have no regrets. I know that I don’t.
Always Your Beloved,